THE PROPHET by Kahlil Gibran
Here is Gibran's piece on children, from his book The Prophet. What ideas about the relationship between parents and children is he expressing here?
And a woman who held a babe against her bosom said, Speak to us of Children.
And he said:
Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteDear Professor Andrijašević,
ReplyDeleteHere is my assignment:
In this passage, Gibran expresses the idea that children do not truly belong to their parents. They come through their parents, but they are not their possessions. He explains that children have their own identities, thoughts, and paths in life. Even though parents can give love, protection, and a home, they cannot decide what their children should think or who they should become.
Gibran also shows that children belong to the future, while parents belong to a different time. Because of that, parents cannot fully shape or control the world their children are heading into. Instead, they should simply guide them with kindness and let them grow in their own direction.
The metaphor of the "bow" and the "arrow" makes this idea very clear. The parent is the bow that provides support and strength, while the child is the arrow that must eventually fly on its own. The arrow goes forward, farther than the bow can ever reach, meaning that children must live their own lives, not their parents’ lives.
Overall, Gibran suggests that the best kind of love parents can give is a love that supports but does not limit. Parents should be steady and strong, but they should also accept that their children have their own dreams and destinies. Letting them go, while still loving them, is an important part of being a good parent.
In the end, Gibran’s message is gentle but powerful: children are meant to grow beyond their parents, not stay in their shadow. When parents understand this, their love becomes a source of strength, not pressure, and it allows children to become the best version of themselves.
Best regards,
Jovana Mićanović (1800/24)
Thank you Jovana! I hope AI hasn't been inappropriately involved in your answer.
ReplyDeleteI think this text is showing us a comlex problem that every generation comes accros. I had a conversation with my friend about going abroad, and the biggest obsticle to him was his mother. I told him ,,Our parents have a problem with letting us go. They don't want a indepedent child, they want a child on a leash, they bring us to this world so that they would have an object towards which they direct their love. In us, they look for security and the meaning of their lives and they do it out of pure love, but the fact is that they will never let us go."
ReplyDeleteI think that this coresponds with this poem a lot. And i share the same opinions. I think that all parent should read this poem, especially the traditional ones.
Thank you, Jovana!
ReplyDeleteIn The Prophet, Kahlil Gibran writes about children in a way that feels very human and emotional. He reminds us that children aren't possessions. They come into this world through their parents, but they have their own inner world, thoughts, and feelings.From a psychological point of view, this text speaks about healthy development and emotional freedom. Every child needs love, safety, and support, but also space to grow into their own person. When parents try to control their children too much, they can stop them from discovering who they really are.
ReplyDeleteGibran’s idea of the bow and the arrow is very powerful. Parents give strength, direction, and protection, but children move forward into the future.Psychologically, this means that parents should guide, not dominate.True support isn't shaping children according to our expectations ,and parents shouldn't try to make their children the same as they are.They should believe in their children's abilities and potential and allow them to gradually become independent individuals at the right moment in life.
This text made me think about how important emotional understanding is in parenting.From my point of view, parents play very important role in helping children grow emotionally strong. They should be understanding, and patient, but also know when to step back. Allowing children to slowly become independent is not a loss for parents, but a sign of love and maturity. Independence doesn't happen suddenly -it grows with time, experience and support.
In the end, I believe that love isn't about control, but about trust.Trust gives children confidence and helps them believe in themselves.When parents allow children to be who they truly are, they give them the greatest gift: the freedom to grow into their own person. That is how emotionally healthy, confident, and responsible individuals are created.
Thank you, Boris!
DeleteParents often think that it’s their responsibility to control everything in their children’s lives. They are afraid to let them live the way they want to, because every parent has the same thought: “I know what’s best for my children.” Most of the time, parents don’t even want to listen to or understand the needs and wishes of their children. They don’t realise that children are the future of the world; they bring new, fresh ideas and new ways of life, because for parents, children are just little, fragile human beings who don’t know how to think or take care of themselves. Parents should be there to give proper upbringing, but at the same time allow their children to be free and explore the world, because no one is ever saved from their own destiny. I understand that it’s hard for parents to be this open-minded and not fear that their beloved children could be their “unsuccessful project.” Most of them find the only meaning in life by having children, and they make sure their children know all the sacrifices they made for them.
ReplyDeleteParents and children are totally different generations, with different mindsets, goals, and aspirations in life. They shouldn’t be the same, because the world needs to evolve and change. Every old generation says that the new one is horrible and that the end of the world is near, but we are still here, living, making something out of this life, and fighting with parents about “who is right.”
Being a parent is a very hard job, so I think before becoming one, you should solve your problems and traumas, and be satisfied with life so you can be a good role model and really enjoy parenthood, balancing what you think is good with what your children want.
Maša Raičević (1807/24)
Thank you, Maša!
DeleteGibran in this part of the book ‚‚Prophet” gave us many ideas about what relationship between parents and their children should look like. When becoming parents, some people let themselves sink deep into the feelings that overflow them completely. Of course, it is a very special and important moment of every adult’s life and that exact moment is marked with parents’ need to protect, love children, hold them close, keep them safe, nurtured and happy. Sometimes, these emotions can be exaggerated. Parents often forget that they are not raising their own puppets, but people of their own, children that will in future become their own people, independent and ready for life. Thus, the Gibran’s verse “Your children are not your children.”. It is very important that every parent directs their children through their life, but in a way that is not commanding, in a way that shows them different options and points out consequences of their options. That is how we make people with knowledge and minds of their own. The verse “For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.” points out how every child shall become the tailor of their own fate, and parents should learn how to accept that. This is why Gibran uses the metaphor for bows and arrows. Parents are bows that launch their children into the world, but with confidence that they did enough for their children so they would be sharp and bright like a glorious arrow which finds its way through the world.
ReplyDeleteDuška Karadžić 1818/24
Thank you, Duska!
ReplyDeleteIn this little text we got, we can see so much wisdom about parenting stuff and generally living life as indiviudal. First we are told that our parents do not possess us despite giving us life we live now, God gave us life and channeled through our parents. We are not things that are owned although we live most of our (early) life with them (people who live in the Balkan know what im talking about) and our life must be totally individual in terms of adult life decisions. When they try to make us like them, they are going backwards but they are past, life moves forward towards future where we belong. They must learn from us, they are the ones who are left behind. But they are,as said, our bows to fire us ( we are arrow, again something moving to future) and God is everywhere, watching and He is satisfied when He sees stable bows and sees us flying. Parents are there to guide us like psychotherapist do with their patients. Children and patients are in charge, we are decision makers and we are responsible for our life just as we are free to make decisions, to be free is to be responsible.
ReplyDeleteThis is our last blog i guess, our journey comes to an end but with a nice topic we are checking out. Stay well dear professor, please pet your lovely cats for me!
Thank you, Aleksa!
DeleteDear Professor,
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry for submitting my answer so late.
For this one, I'd like to reflect on my answer from Negative power of manipulation, where I mentioned that I think parents should go through 3 phases with their children as they grow up. They should teach them until they become teenagers, then guide them and finally, simply talk with them.
I think that's the case here as well. I think it's hard for parents to stop being as involved in their child's life as they were while it was growing up. Caring for children and actively trying to shape them into something else are two different things, and parents often justify the latter by saying they (children) are still too young and that they must direct them. Even when they are teenagers...
Next, love shouldn't be possessive or conditional. Young individuals today are vocal and can be heard saying they didn't ask to be born. It's a rough sentiment, but essentially, I think it's true. The child is completely parent's responsibility and it's going to become a working capable individual, so to withhold things or to care for it conditionally is unacceptable. And to love him or her possessively is unfortunately the sign of some bigger problem or even trauma on the parent's side and doting on the kid isn't the solution to that.
I also read somewhere that all children are kids of the future. They need to have their own individuality, creativity, way of thinking and parents can only contribute so much in the beginning. When teenagers are ready to leave the nest so to say, parents should be happy for them. They should be their rocks and be joyful that they could watch their kids grew up. That they could prepare them for life to the best of their abilities and allow them to reach their own potential, not increase parent's one.
Finally, to summarize, parents should guide, nurture, provide stability, be emotional support and let their children be their awesome, cute and witty selves.
With kind regards,
Julija Mijušković 1809/24
Thank you, Julija!
DeleteI would interpret these verses as emphasizing that children are not the property of their parents, but separate individuals who are born with a certain degree of autonomy. Parents are the most important figures in every child’s upbringing, because, as is widely known, the child is the father of the man, and experiences from childhood and from relationships with parents shape our future patterns of behavior, emotional attachment, and, in general, our understanding of the world and life.
ReplyDeleteOur parents should be a source of unconditional support, providing understanding and love. It is important to note that it is their first time living as well, just as it is ours, and for that very reason we equally deserve freedom and encouragement. If they had the right to make decisions and mistakes, why shouldn’t we? Some things are best understood when experienced firsthand, yet for parents we remain children who “must” be sheltered and protected from the harsh and merciless claws of the world.
However, curiosity and the need for freedom that each of us carries overcome prohibitions, criticism, and even certain parental precautionary measures. As I mentioned earlier, parents should not expect to fulfill their unachieved goals and dreams through their children by dictating how they should live. Instead, a child should be supported and guided toward the right path from an early age - raised in such a way that the values they learn will accompany them throughout every area of life.
Thank you, Katarina!
ReplyDeleteTo me, the main idea of Gibran’s piece is that the relationship between parents and children should be built on love, guidance, and the ability to let go, rather than control or ownership. While reading this text, I thought about how parents often want to choose what is best for their children, believing they know the right path. However, Gibran reminds us that every child has their own purpose and direction in life. For example, a parent may want their child to follow a certain career, but the child may feel passionate about something completely different. I believe that true love means supporting the child’s choices, even when they are not the same as the parent’s. Parents help their children become confident and independent individuals.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Ivana!
Delete